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YOUR FAVORITE BAND SUCKS

Aerosmith Sucks

Aerosmith Sucks

 

If we had a dollar for every time someone told us to listen to Aerosmith’s early stuff, we’d pay Aerosmith to stop being a band. And they’d take the money. You know why?

The only thing they’ve ever been good at is taking money from idiots.

Aerosmith sucks.

Destiny’s Child Sucks: Part 2

Destiny's Child Sucks Part 2

Well, it turns out we weren’t ready for the jelly. Talking about this soap opera of a “group” took longer than we thought it would, so here’s Part 2: The Bootylicious-ing! Can Mark & Tyler prove themselves survivors? Listen and see.

Destiny’s Child Sucks

Destiny's Child Sucks

Let’s just say there’s such a thing as your dad being too big of a Jackson 5 fan. There’s also a reason your worst high school girlfriend listened to Destiny’s Child.

Ready for this history lesson on 90s pop? No, you’re not. You could never be ready for us to tell you EVERYTHING THE ILLUMINATI DOESN’T WANT YOU TO KNOW about Destiny’s Child…

You could never be ready for this jelly.

Beck Sucks: Part 2

Beck Sucks Part 2

This guy should have been a one-hit wonder and we never should have had to do a single episode about him.

But no…

You people had to start taking him seriously after Odelay and now this is happening: Beck Sucks, Pt. 2: Beck to the Future! Mark & Tyler get into the ridiculous critical acceptance of “Sad Beck,” the Grammy Awards and, inevitably, more Scientology…

Beck Sucks

Beck Sucks

Beck is the only argument needed against having respect for 90s pop culture.

This is what every 8th grade boy in America was like before ADHD meds were invented. Beck’s music is what it would sound like if chugging a 3-liter of Surge cola and shooting yourself in the b-hole with a paintball gun was a band. Now add Scientology.

See?

Beethoven Sucks

Beethoven Sucks

It’s no exaggeration to say this podcast probably wouldn’t exist without the everlasting influence of Ludwig van Beethoven on music…

This guy sucks so much he basically invented it. He sucks so bad it killed classical music entirely – which is actually pretty awesome, not gonna lie. Beethoven sucks so hard we had to make this long episode AND A NEW T-SHIRT about it…

Click on Tyler’s original artwork below to pre-order the new shirt while you listen:

Beethoven Sucks t-shirt