Sublime Sucks

Sublime Sucks

Life IS too short so listen to this and learn exactly why you should never waste another second of your existence hearing Sublime.

Everyone with a brain in their head already knows that Sublime sucks, right? The answer is yes. Maybe you think you’ve got a good idea of how much this band sucks. Trust us, it’s worse. There is so much awful information waiting for you in this episode. Honestly, this may be a Top Ten Worst Band of All Time, people. And if you don’t believe that, hey, press play and let us know how you feel after listening.

Bon Jovi Sucks

Bon Jovi Sucks

Bon Jovi sucks so much Mark and Tyler can’t even get worked up over it. Listen as your favorite podcast hosts casually dismantle this band’s career until, eventually, with no worthy adversary to team up against, Mark and Tyler turn on each other…

As we’ve seen before, Bon Jovi isn’t even a band. It’s John Bongiovi’s personal ego trip, kid-tested and mother-approved. Sometimes a pocketful of clich├ęs is all it takes to reach the *cough*laughing-stock*cough* Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, kids!

There isn’t going to be an episode of the podcast next week because Tyler and Mark are mad at each other over this one.

Nirvana Sucks

 

Nirvana Sucks

Voted one of the Five Worst Bands of the ’90s by Rolling Stone readers in 2013, Nirvana made what BBC listeners in 2005 considered to be the most overrated album ever, Nevermind. So, it’s not even up to us, the results are in and Nirvana sucks!

You know we have problems with Kurt Cobain being one of the most heralded “songwriters” of the slacker generation. (He’s not even a songwriter, let alone a good one.) You know we have problems with Nirvana biting their sound from better bands. You know we have problems with this whole 27 Club suicide death cult self-selected martyr thing.

But Nirvana was merely a symptom of a much larger problem: grunge. A truly awful cacophony – and dangerous, too! It’s quite possible that grunge killed more people than gangster rap. Anyway, you’re already pissed off about us making this episode, so you may as well listen to it now.

Weezer Sucks

Weezer Sucks

 

If Weezer were a newly discovered animal species, the Latin name would be dorkus malorkus. The only guy in the band who matters thinks songwriting can be done with formulas and spreadsheets. What more do you need to know? How about some nerdy sexism?

Yeah, yeah. You liked this band when you were a teenager. Question: you ever make any other mistakes when you were a teenager? After listening to the evidence in this episode, you should agree with us that Weezer’s existence is nothing more than a giant mistake and it’s time to bring it all to an end.

The Grateful Dead Sucks

The Grateful Dead Sucks

It’s possible The Grateful Dead smelled even worse than they sounded, which is really saying something. Even their fans agree, this band sucks. But let’s be honest, this episode is just as much about trashing hippies as it is about trashing The Grateful Dead. And one of the worst things about hippies is that they think it’s acceptable to listen to The Grateful Dead. It’s not.

The only way anyone tolerated the sound was by being annihilated on drugs. Well, then there’s Ann Coulter…